The world’s most unnecessary yet emotionally accurate app.
Gooner Tracker is a satire lifestyle app that helps you log your darkest digital habits, reflect on your screen-time sins, and laugh at your own downfall. It’s like a fitness tracker… but for the mindless scroll. And with eggplants.
You won’t get better, but you will be self-aware.
Track Your Sessions
Because data is power. And you’re going to need a lot of it to realize how far you’ve fallen.
Leaderboards
Compete with other degenerates. Or don’t. That’s probably healthier.
Custom Reminders
A motivational slap from your phone when you least want it.
Achievements You Shouldn’t Be Proud Of
Earn badges like “Day 1 Relapse” and “3am Demon.”
Premium Add-Ons That Add Nothing
Pay to unlock features that do literally nothing except entertain you.
No.
Gooner Tracker is 100% satire.
It’s not a replacement for therapy, accountability partners, or your mother’s disappointed stare.
Available on the App Store.